You ARE So Worth It! 3 Steps to Improve Your Self-Worth

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I talk about how worthy you are all the time.  But, now, let’s talk about WHY you are so worthy, and how much you are, and how very special and unique you are.   Knowing these things is integral for you to improve your self-worth.

Self-worth, self-doubt and self-esteem are epidemic in our world, especially among women.  We need to expose this and empower you to know just how valuable you are and just how worthy you are of every damn thing you want in this world!

When I’m working with my clients, and women in general, I hear their stories of struggle in their lives related to men, relationships, work issues, family issues, parenting issues, etc.  The glaring piece of information that is in common with all of them is their lack of self-worth.  What I started to discover is that it’s the one common denominator with everyone I work with.  They have no idea how worthy they are.  That realization created my mission statement, based on empowering women who don’t know their self-worth to discover their true divinity, power, and purpose.

Many women feel subordinate.  Many women feel incomplete in many ways.  Many women feel like second class citizens.  Many women feel like they are nothing if they don’t have a man or children.  Many women are so hard on themselves!   Why are women so hard on themselves???

This is worth exploring more.  I believe the reason women feel this way is because of old paradigms in their mental programming.  I believe if women knew just how powerful they are, they would use their strength and intelligence in a much more profound way, creating a world so rich in love and harmony.  Instead, their fears, doubts and insecurities create jealously, disconnection and competitiveness.

Here’s the thing…Women ROCK!  Women are multi-talented, multi-dimensional, and multi-taskers!  Women can handle so many things at once!  Women are the greatest leaders in the world! We mother, we teach, we nurture!  Women are the most powerful creators…we birth life, for goodness sake!  That is the greatest definition of creator next to God!

So, ladies, how can I enlighten you and empower you to know just how WORTHY you are of your existence and your place on this earth?  Here are three steps to create your worthiness. All three of these steps have been taken straight from my book, “I Have Today: Find Your Passion, Purpose and Smile…Finally!” If you’d like more information, you can purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and my own site!

Empowering You through Affirmations

Empowerment means everything. We tend to take the back seat by putting everyone else’s needs in front of our own. Then, we inevitably get lost in the mix. We want so much to please everyone. By doing so much for others as opposed to putting ourselves first, we wind up feeling depleted, drained, and exhausted…which is very far away from feeling our strength and power.

With all that depletion comes the self-defeating negative conversations within ourselves. Why do we talk about ourselves this way? We are divine, amazing, wonderful beings. But we say things to ourselves like we are not smart enough, we are not good enough, we are not pretty enough, we are not deserving enough, we are fat, we are ugly, we will never lose this weight, we will never get married, we will never have time to do the things we want to do. We can go on, and on, and on. We have to stop it!

Our self-dialogue, whether spoken aloud or even just to ourselves, is having a ripple effect on everyone around us…especially on our children. They learn by example. They watch what we do and they mirror us. They can’t help it.
So, it’s incumbent on you to empower yourself with empowering words…words like “I am worthy, I am a goddess, I am divine.”  Affirm words like that over and over, and over again every day until you believe it!

Affirmations can be really powerful, but you have to use the right affirmations. If they don’t resonate with you, then it’s just empty airtime.

Usually, I list the Affirmation Statements at the end, but TODAY, given the subject matter, it’s appropriate to list them here.  Say these aloud and see how they feel for you.




If you want more affirmations, there are over 150 powerful affirmations in the “I Have Today System: Find Your Passion, Purpose and Smile in 90 Days or Less” at

I have found the more I affirm, the more the empowerment flows to me and through me. It’s good to “own” it and know who you are; what you’re willing to do and not do; to be “selfish” in a good way.  It is not something to feel guilty or bad about. You are not taking away from anybody else by you being selfish and putting yourself first and empowering you.  The truth is…when you do, you will be able to give even more!

Create Healthy Boundaries

Another element to connecting with your power is by creating healthy boundaries. One way to do that is by getting comfortable saying the word “no” to people. There are many ways to say “no” in a very healthy way to all the people in your life without causing negative feelings or reactions. If you don’t want to do something, for heaven’s sake, do not do it! Be less willing to say yes right away and more time to process a request before responding.

For example, let’s say you’re in an argument with your mom. A great way to create safe boundaries is to create some space…for you! Here’s how: you might say to her, “I hear you Mom; I appreciate where you are coming from, but I can’t take this on right now. And, while I appreciate and respect what you are going through and where you are coming from, I hope you will do the same for me and appreciate where I am coming from right now. I just need some space and some time. Maybe we can talk about this later or at another time under different circumstances. I am happy to do that, but right now, I have to respect my own feelings.”

Another example is this…

Something in the moment may sound really good. But, upon further reflection, it’s maybe not such a good idea.  Instead of instinctively saying “yes,” learn to say “no” in a respectful way. For example,  “I appreciate your offer, request, etc., but I’d like a little time to think about it and get back to you. I hope that you can appreciate where I’m coming from.” Simple, easy, understandable. You are taking into consideration what works and does not work for you. That’s how you decide what your boundaries are. That is how you respect your time and your worthiness.

You are worth taking the time to create a space where you can process things and not overreact.  When you give yourself time and space, the situation dissipates.  When you revisit it, you come from a place of WORTHINESS and POWER, not a place of victim and wounded child.  That is a much healthier state of being.

Practice this wherever possible by asking yourself this question in any given situation. Do I really want to be doing this? Will this bring me happiness? Am I doing this out of some sense of obligation? By asking yourself questions like this, you’ll start to recognize patterns of where you don’t honor your boundaries, and the “lines” will become clearer.

Be Selfish in a Really Good Way

When you are selfish in a really good way, you can serve the world with much more enthusiasm.

This is a stretch for many women because we have become so accustomed to serving the needs of others first. When you are selfishly loving yourself, caring for yourself, nurturing yourself, you will be emanating radiance, happiness, and joy. You will feel better about doing everything in your life.  My “Selfishness” is I get up every day and express my gratitude. Then, I go and do my routine of nurturing my spirit, mind and body. After that, I feel amazing and ready to take on the day! That’s because I put myself first! That’s the definition of being selfish in a really good way.  It means figuring out how you can serve YOU FIRST above everyone else so that your heart, your soul and your energy tank are full and ready to take on whatever may come during the day.  By putting you first, your level of self-worth sky rockets!!!  So, be as selfish as you can be, then go conquer the world!!!  We need you!!!!

I can’t say enough about the force of being an empowered person. It is your birth right. It is who you are. It is your essence. Do not discount that…don’t play small! When you play small, you deprive this world of your greatness.

You have to play big. You have to shine bright. You have got to be the biggest, boldest, most wonderful being that you can possibly be…and that takes empowerment and knowing your true worth!

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Quote:  “When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.” –  Brene Brown