America’s Mindset Coach. Intentional living expert.

Learn How to Flow

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What is “flow?”  No, ladies, I’m not talking about that once a month occurrence that happens to our bodies.  I’m referring to the releasing of resistance, negative energy and uninspired action, and allowing your life to unfold each moment of every day and allowing the universe to guide you to everything you want.  Whether you realize it or not, the universe it guiding you anyway, but are you paying attention?  So, when you learn how to flow and you release the resistance, man… does your life get better!  It gets richer, happier, more peaceful, fun, spontaneous, and energized…. It’s incredible!  This is truly the way we are supposed to be living.

When I’m working with clients, I help them clear away the blockages and negative talk, emotions and thoughts, and I help them look at things differently than they did before.  That process creates massive, rapid results because they follow the processes and they WANT the changes!  They don’t want to be “stuck” in patterns any longer…especially in their relationships.

In relationships where there is struggle, 99.99% of the time it is because there is resistance.  One or both people is fighting for their viewpoint, and it is ego-based.  They are not open-hearted enough or not coming from a heart-centered space to be able to see the other person’s perspective, and that causes a rift and friction.  That tension causes the resistance, and there is no way that relationship can flow under those conditions.  Therefore, if there was a heightened awareness of FLOW and the way it works, it would make conflict resolution so simple!  It would make your communication and connection so deep.  The couple would realize it’s not “his way” or “her way.”  It’s just “the way.”  And the way is flow…let it go and flow…flow towards the easiest, least resistant path.

How can we equate this to our relationships and the way this is working within the universe? Time is only moving in one direction.  The water running down the river only goes downstream.  That is the way the universe works!  So, learning the art of flow is easy to do when you think about that visual.  When you’re struggling with a situation, with anyone or anything, you are fighting the flow.  You’re letting your ego get in the way.  The universe is trying to let it in, but it cannot come to you because you are literally blocking the path of flow.

Flow allows you to release and let go of the outcome of somebody else’s agenda.  Flow lets you trust the higher power and trust that it’s all working out for you.  Here’s how you can practice it:

Step 1: Close Your Eyes and Imagine It’s Your 80th Birthday

This may seem silly, but try it!  Imagine it’s your 80th birthday party.  All the people you love are there celebrating you.  As you sit there, in love and gratitude, look back on your life.  In that moment, you realize that everything you ever wanted has come true for you and you have never needed to worry about anything!  All your wishes came true and your life has been such a beautiful journey.  You are happier than you’ve ever imagined, and you wish you didn’t waste all that time being worried or upset, or that you didn’t spend any time struggling.  HAVE FUN with this exercise and do it as often as you need to!  This is a great “go-to” when you feel like you’re struggling with something.

Step 2: Do the Placemat Exercise

This is from “Ask and It Is Given” by Esther and Abraham Hicks.  In the back of the book, there are 22 Processes.  This is one of them.  This is SO MUCH FUN! Take out a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle.  At the top of the left side write “Things I Want to Do and I Enjoy Doing” and on the right side write “What I want The Universe to Do for Me.”   Under your column, write down the things you want to do and enjoy doing, and on the right side, list everything you don’t enjoy doing or you think is hard to do.  Make the list on that side of the page as long as you want!  Then, let go and FLOW!  Let the universe go to work on that list.  But, VERY IMPORTANT, you must PAY ATTENTION to all the signs from the universe coming to you…the phone calls you get out of the blue, the songs you hear, the surprises in the mail, the emails you get…all of it!  This is a phenomenal practice!!!  I use this process to powerfully manifest many things into my life.  So, let this work for you!

Step 3: Follow Your Inspired Action and the Point of Least Resistance

This sounds lazy and unproductive, but only do things when you are in INSPIRED ACTION!  If you’ve got something you should be doing, but you don’t feel like doing it…instead, you want to read a book, call a friend, take a walk, take a nap…do that instead.  Do not do anything important without being in inspired action, because the results will not be good.  It won’t be the quality you want it to be, you will struggle with it, it will feel difficult and challenging.  Trust me, I have done this before, and the results have not been good.  Follow your FLOW and do what you FEEL LIKE doing, and TRUST that the inspiration WILL COME and you will meet your deadline and get done whatever it is you need to get done.  This is so easy, yet people don’t do this.  They beat themselves up for being “lazy” and “unproductive” which is contrary to the truth.

If you’re not feeling the “flow” the answer should be “no.”  So, learning how to follow your flow will guide you to following your bliss.  Go with the Flow!

Watch the Webinar!

LOVE IT!:  I LOVE THE WAY MY LIFE FLOWS WITH EASE.

THANK IT:!  I AM GRATEFUL FOR THE GRACEFUL FLOW OF MY LIFE.

BRING IT:!  I KNOW HOW TO FLOW, SO ABUNDANCE AND HAPPINESS POUR ALL OVER ME!

Quote:  “May what I do flow from me like a river, no forcing and no holding back, the way it si with children.” – Rainer Maria

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www.dianeforster.com

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You ARE So Worth It! 3 Steps to Improve Your Self-Worth

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I talk about how worthy you are all the time.  But, now, let’s talk about WHY you are so worthy, and how much you are, and how very special and unique you are.   Knowing these things is integral for you to improve your self-worth.

Self-worth, self-doubt and self-esteem are epidemic in our world, especially among women.  We need to expose this and empower you to know just how valuable you are and just how worthy you are of every damn thing you want in this world!

When I’m working with my clients, and women in general, I hear their stories of struggle in their lives related to men, relationships, work issues, family issues, parenting issues, etc.  The glaring piece of information that is in common with all of them is their lack of self-worth.  What I started to discover is that it’s the one common denominator with everyone I work with.  They have no idea how worthy they are.  That realization created my mission statement, based on empowering women who don’t know their self-worth to discover their true divinity, power, and purpose.

Many women feel subordinate.  Many women feel incomplete in many ways.  Many women feel like second class citizens.  Many women feel like they are nothing if they don’t have a man or children.  Many women are so hard on themselves!   Why are women so hard on themselves???

This is worth exploring more.  I believe the reason women feel this way is because of old paradigms in their mental programming.  I believe if women knew just how powerful they are, they would use their strength and intelligence in a much more profound way, creating a world so rich in love and harmony.  Instead, their fears, doubts and insecurities create jealously, disconnection and competitiveness.

Here’s the thing…Women ROCK!  Women are multi-talented, multi-dimensional, and multi-taskers!  Women can handle so many things at once!  Women are the greatest leaders in the world! We mother, we teach, we nurture!  Women are the most powerful creators…we birth life, for goodness sake!  That is the greatest definition of creator next to God!

So, ladies, how can I enlighten you and empower you to know just how WORTHY you are of your existence and your place on this earth?  Here are three steps to create your worthiness. All three of these steps have been taken straight from my book, “I Have Today: Find Your Passion, Purpose and Smile…Finally!” If you’d like more information, you can purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and my own site!

Empowering You through Affirmations

Empowerment means everything. We tend to take the back seat by putting everyone else’s needs in front of our own. Then, we inevitably get lost in the mix. We want so much to please everyone. By doing so much for others as opposed to putting ourselves first, we wind up feeling depleted, drained, and exhausted…which is very far away from feeling our strength and power.

With all that depletion comes the self-defeating negative conversations within ourselves. Why do we talk about ourselves this way? We are divine, amazing, wonderful beings. But we say things to ourselves like we are not smart enough, we are not good enough, we are not pretty enough, we are not deserving enough, we are fat, we are ugly, we will never lose this weight, we will never get married, we will never have time to do the things we want to do. We can go on, and on, and on. We have to stop it!

Our self-dialogue, whether spoken aloud or even just to ourselves, is having a ripple effect on everyone around us…especially on our children. They learn by example. They watch what we do and they mirror us. They can’t help it.
So, it’s incumbent on you to empower yourself with empowering words…words like “I am worthy, I am a goddess, I am divine.”  Affirm words like that over and over, and over again every day until you believe it!

Affirmations can be really powerful, but you have to use the right affirmations. If they don’t resonate with you, then it’s just empty airtime.

Usually, I list the Affirmation Statements at the end, but TODAY, given the subject matter, it’s appropriate to list them here.  Say these aloud and see how they feel for you.

LOVE IT! I AM SO EMPOWERED!

THANK IT!  I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR MY EMPOWERMENT!

BRING IT!  I HAVE ROCKET SHIP POWER!!!

If you want more affirmations, there are over 150 powerful affirmations in the “I Have Today System: Find Your Passion, Purpose and Smile in 90 Days or Less” at HERE

I have found the more I affirm, the more the empowerment flows to me and through me. It’s good to “own” it and know who you are; what you’re willing to do and not do; to be “selfish” in a good way.  It is not something to feel guilty or bad about. You are not taking away from anybody else by you being selfish and putting yourself first and empowering you.  The truth is…when you do, you will be able to give even more!

Create Healthy Boundaries

Another element to connecting with your power is by creating healthy boundaries. One way to do that is by getting comfortable saying the word “no” to people. There are many ways to say “no” in a very healthy way to all the people in your life without causing negative feelings or reactions. If you don’t want to do something, for heaven’s sake, do not do it! Be less willing to say yes right away and more time to process a request before responding.

For example, let’s say you’re in an argument with your mom. A great way to create safe boundaries is to create some space…for you! Here’s how: you might say to her, “I hear you Mom; I appreciate where you are coming from, but I can’t take this on right now. And, while I appreciate and respect what you are going through and where you are coming from, I hope you will do the same for me and appreciate where I am coming from right now. I just need some space and some time. Maybe we can talk about this later or at another time under different circumstances. I am happy to do that, but right now, I have to respect my own feelings.”

Another example is this…

Something in the moment may sound really good. But, upon further reflection, it’s maybe not such a good idea.  Instead of instinctively saying “yes,” learn to say “no” in a respectful way. For example,  “I appreciate your offer, request, etc., but I’d like a little time to think about it and get back to you. I hope that you can appreciate where I’m coming from.” Simple, easy, understandable. You are taking into consideration what works and does not work for you. That’s how you decide what your boundaries are. That is how you respect your time and your worthiness.

You are worth taking the time to create a space where you can process things and not overreact.  When you give yourself time and space, the situation dissipates.  When you revisit it, you come from a place of WORTHINESS and POWER, not a place of victim and wounded child.  That is a much healthier state of being.

Practice this wherever possible by asking yourself this question in any given situation. Do I really want to be doing this? Will this bring me happiness? Am I doing this out of some sense of obligation? By asking yourself questions like this, you’ll start to recognize patterns of where you don’t honor your boundaries, and the “lines” will become clearer.

Be Selfish in a Really Good Way

When you are selfish in a really good way, you can serve the world with much more enthusiasm.

This is a stretch for many women because we have become so accustomed to serving the needs of others first. When you are selfishly loving yourself, caring for yourself, nurturing yourself, you will be emanating radiance, happiness, and joy. You will feel better about doing everything in your life.  My “Selfishness” is I get up every day and express my gratitude. Then, I go and do my routine of nurturing my spirit, mind and body. After that, I feel amazing and ready to take on the day! That’s because I put myself first! That’s the definition of being selfish in a really good way.  It means figuring out how you can serve YOU FIRST above everyone else so that your heart, your soul and your energy tank are full and ready to take on whatever may come during the day.  By putting you first, your level of self-worth sky rockets!!!  So, be as selfish as you can be, then go conquer the world!!!  We need you!!!!

I can’t say enough about the force of being an empowered person. It is your birth right. It is who you are. It is your essence. Do not discount that…don’t play small! When you play small, you deprive this world of your greatness.

You have to play big. You have to shine bright. You have got to be the biggest, boldest, most wonderful being that you can possibly be…and that takes empowerment and knowing your true worth!

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Quote:  “When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.” –  Brene Brown

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Only 4% of Women Think They Are Beautiful …Four Steps to Change That!

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The brand Dove put out an incredible piece awhile back about women in five cities around the world.  They were given two doorways to choose to pass through…the “Beautiful” doorway or the “Average” doorway.  Guess which doorway most of the women chose.  I’ll post the link to it at the end of the blog so you can see it if you haven’t.  It’s worth the watch.  Enlightening. 

It’s so heartbreaking to think that only 4% of women think they are beautiful.  4%…Really?  This is dedicated to the other 96% of women out there.  My intention is that by the end of this, you’ll see yourself in a new light.  A new, beautiful light.  The light that reflects on your incredible beauty.

What is the definition of beautiful anyway?  Well, it means “pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically.”  It also means “possessing the qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses or mind.”    Based on those two definitions, I believe beauty is a CHOICE.  If you sense it and you think it, then aren’t you?  Would it matter what the rest of the world thought?  No.  It would only matter what others thought IF YOU LET IT. 

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are bombarded by the media with messages that subliminally make us believe we are not good enough.  Buy this lipstick, wear these Spanx (no offense, Sara Blakely, I’m a huge fan!), dye your hair, don’t eat this, eat that, and on and on.

When we do these things, the reason we do it needs to be for one reason, and one reason only.  Because it makes us feel good about ourselves.  We cannot and should not be doing them for anyone else.  Now, I’m not saying that your man won’t benefit from your beautiful new haircut and your hot sexy dress.  Hopefully, he’s the type of man to notice that level of detail.  However, the reason you do it is for YOU.  When we pamper ourselves, love ourselves, do things that make us feel good, we light up!  We just FEEL better, plain and simple. 

Yet, the real issue is that we women tend to always COMPARE ourselves to other women.  She’s got nicer hair than I do, her body is in better shape, she has porcelain skin, her smile is radiant. 

I did an experiment a while back, shortly after my divorce and in the midst of my self-awakening and personal development.  Every time I saw myself in the mirror, whether actively looking or just walking by, I stopped for a second and said “I am GORGEOUS!”  I did this for about two weeks.  Then, I attended a networking event, and I was stunned at the number of people who approached me and referred to me as “GORGEOUS!”  Not pretty, not looking great, not even beautiful.  They used the word I used.  Now, if that’s not powerful proof that we are what we say we are, then I don’t know what is!  It was just an experiment, but what it did for me was lift my spirits, it gave me power and confidence, and it proved to me that the only opinion of myself that truly matters is my own!    Because the way I see myself is a mirror reflection of the way others will see me.  It’s in the energy I am emitting.  I’m passing it along telepathically.  Isn’t that fascinating!?! 

Well, guess what…so are YOU!  What is the program about yourself that’s running through your mind and running your life?  Not beautiful enough?  YOU ARE, YOU ARE, YOU ARE!  I can scream it from the mountaintop, but it will not matter!  It will only matter when YOU BELIEVE IT!  So, I encourage you to please believe it.  Now, I’m going to give you some steps to make that happen.


Step 1

Grab a handheld mirror or stand in front of a mirror.  Look deep into your eyes.  Stare into the opposite eye of your dominant hand.  Keep staring, for at least a minute.  Maybe two or three.  As you’re doing that, do Louise Hay’s work of saying “I Love You, (add your name), I really, really love you.”  As you’re doing this, you will start to notice that your edges start to fade way.  You can literally see yourself expand and see your soul.  It’s so powerful!  THAT is who you are…not just the physical form that you look at every day.  You will be connecting with your BEAUTIFUL Soul!  Enjoy this, and do it every day, if possible.  You’ll begin to feel a shift in you, and you will definitely start experiencing your inner perfection and beauty.

Step 2

Pick a word to describe yourself, like I did.  Feel free to use “GORGEOUS.”  It’s a good one!  But, pick a word that you would like to be referred to as.  Stunning, Radiant, Pretty, Gorgeous, Sexy, Dynamic, and of course, Beautiful, are all great ones!  Then, do what I did…take every opportunity to call yourself by that word every single time you are in front of a mirror.  Then, pay attention, because people WILL start referring to you that way.  It’s so magnetic!

Step 3

For 30 days, abstain from all media related to beauty, or any topic that you KNOW makes you feel bad about yourself.  Do not read any fashion magazines, blogs, watch anything on the internet or TV.  No celebrity gossip.  Nothing.  It’s only one month, you can do it!  Listen, I abstained from meat for 30 days, just to see if I could do it.  Here I am, 15 years later, and I still no longer eat meat.  You don’t know what’s possible until you try.  I’m not suggesting you make it a permanent change.  I’m only asking that you try this experiment and see what starts to happen to you in regards to the way your feel about yourself.  It’s SO worth the effort.

Step 4

This is probably the most important step of all.  I want you to write down a list of ALL the things that you LOVE about yourself.  (We referenced doing this in our “Get Your Sexy Back Blog and Webinar,” but this time you’ll be writing it down and going deeper with it.)  Write down every little detail, like, I love the curve from my waistline to my hipbones, I love the feel of the back of my neck, I like my knees, I like my eyes, I like the way I look when I smile, I love the arch of my eyebrows.  You get the picture…write down EVERYTHING.  Make the list as long as possible.  You can keep this in your journal, or you can keep it near one of the mirrors you spend time in front of every day.  That could be your make-up mirror or your bathroom mirror, but place it somewhere that will keep it top-of-mind for you.  When you see it, stop for a minute and read it.  Remind yourself DAILY about how much you love about yourself.  When you do that on a regular basis, what you love about yourself will expand.  It’s the Law of Attraction.  And it works…every single time!  That’s why it’s called “Law.”

Well…I hope you’re excited about these four steps, and I hope I made good on my intention at the start of this blog…that you see yourself in a new light.  Or, at the very least, the possibilities.

Watch the “DOVE” video, and think about yourself when you watch these women struggle with something that is truly our birthright…our unique, exquisite beauty!  See yourself in all of them, and make the decision that YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!

Watch the Webinar!

Quote:  “Beauty is when you can appreciate yourself.  When you love yourself, that’s when you’re most beautiful.”  – Zoe Kravitz

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