The Real Four Letter Word that Starts with “F”

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The real four letter word that starts with “F” is… FEAR!  Why is there so much fear?  What the heck are we all so afraid of???  What are the fears that are keeping you awake at night?  Fear of dying?  Fear of getting sick?  Fear of being alone?  Fear of running out of money?  Fear of failure?  Fear of rejection?  Fear of never being good enough?  Fear of…..fill in the blank!

In my work with clients, fear is the number one emotion that paralyzes people.  Fear causes people to stay in relationships, or jobs, or situations longer than they should because they are afraid of the unknown.  Fear keeps people from going after their dreams because they are so afraid to make a mistake.  Fear stops people from pursuing what they want because they are so afraid of rejection.  This craziness needs to stop!

I used to have many fears as well.  I can honestly say that I am now no longer afraid of anything.  I do not fear death or illness, going broke, being alone, something happening to my kids or family, what other people think of me.  None of it.  I was able to lift the veil off of fear and see it for what it really is…an emotion!  That’s it!  So, when it occasionally surfaces, I remember that…and I CHOOSE to feel a different emotion!

It didn’t happen overnight, but it did happen quicker than I would have expected.  Now, I want that to happen for YOU!  I want you living without any fear!  Like I speak and write about worry, 99.999% of the things we fear NEVER happen!  We spend so much time, thought and energy on fears, which means we are living in our future and not our present moment!  Let me say it again…this needs to stop!

Here are three steps to help you overcome your fears:

Step 1: Read “Dissolve the Problem” by Richard Dotts

Richard Dotts is a modern day spiritual explorer, and he’s written over 20 books on the science of manifestation and reality creation.  This is one of my favorite books because he talks about his three-step process (sound familiar J?) on how dissolve our problems through his process of soften-shift-stay.  Essentially, it’s about being in an altered state.  This book is a great read, as there are so many wonderful nuggets in it.  This book will help you to see that our perceived problems, which cause us to feel fear, aren’t even real!

Step 2: Write down all the things you are afraid of so you can then speak them aloud.

I learned this trick from Sonia Choquette.  If we feel fear over something and we don’t express it, then it’s living inside of us.  When we speak our fears aloud, we release it from inside ourselves and, in essence, we give it away to the universe.  I added the first piece to the process because by sitting and thinking about all the things you feel fear over, you can eliminate all of them at once.  I believe in efficiency, so why not get rid of all your fears at once.  Then, if you notice new fears or fears you forgot about at another time, just say them aloud.  Let them go!  There is no need to have that bottled up in you!

Step 3: Change your morning routine and you will change your whole life!

How do you start your day?  Do you sleep with your phone next to you and grab it first thing in the morning?  Do you jump out of bed and get going right away?  Do you mentally get involved in all the responsibilities you need to handle?  If this is you, please stop doing that!

Les Brown says the way we spend the first 20 minutes of our day sets us up for success or failure!  So, it is crucial that you spend that morning time in a very specific way!  I’m going to lay out steps that take longer than 20 minutes, but if 20 minutes is all you can spare to start, that’s good enough.  It is my belief that once you begin this morning routine, you’ll look for ways to find more time for yourself.  I personally spend two hours on my morning routine!  OK, here we go:

  1. Upon waking up and opening your eyes, stay in bed for at least a minute or two (5 minutes is best) in gratitude and appreciation of your bed, the sleep you got, how safe and warm you are in there, how comfortable it is, how lucky you are to have a bed to sleep in (do you realize how many people around the world will never know that feeling?)
  2. Once you get out of bed, go use the bathroom then brush your teeth. Put on your morning pot of coffee if that is what you enjoy.  But, before drinking it (or tea, or anything you normally drink in the morning) go find a quiet place to sit down and meditate.  If you are new to meditation, there’s nothing more to it than sitting still, eyes closed, and breathing in and out.  Focus your attention on your breath, and allow yourself to be still.  Do this for anywhere from 5-10 minutes in the morning (15-20 minutes is best.)  If you want to learn my meditation practice, email me at for more information.
  3. After you meditate, go get yourself your cup of coffee, or tea, or juice and go sit down to write in a journal. Write what you are grateful for, how you want to feel, what you WANT your day to look like, etc.  Take control of it…think of only positive things!  Get your mind used to doing that practice…focus on positive, NOT negative thoughts.  You are a creator, so CREATE WHAT YOU WANT!
  4. Last, listen to something motivational or inspirational. If you don’t have time to do it at home, listen to it during your commute to wherever you’re going.  I love Les Brown, Tony Robbins, Jim Rohn, Zig Ziglar, Lisa Nichols, Wayne Dyer, and many, many others.

What is the purpose of this and how does it relate to fear?  This will help with your mindset.  When your mindset is positive and upbeat, fear can’t get in there!

You no longer have to be a victim of fear.  You can CONTROL your mind and your thoughts, and re-direct them in a much safer, happier direction.  Follow these steps and let me know how they work for you!  Let’s get you fearlessly living the life of your dreams!

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Quote:  The eagle has no fear of adversity. We need to be like the eagle and have a fearless spirit of a conqueror!” – Joyce Meyer